After months of waiting, the insurance company finally offered us a settlement.
They tried to tire us out and make us give up. But as I told you, I just did not give up. They asked us to fill many, many forms, asked for lots of pictures, had us search the internet for similar items and price them out and we also had to wait for the claims adjuster to come and access the damage before they made us an offer. And the underwriter kept asking for more and more. Eventually we just had to say enough is enough. We didn't hear back from them for a while.
Then, they had people come to fix some of the broken items, they dry-cleaned some clothes. They disappeared again.
Now they offered a cash settlement for our claim. it is not even close to what it would be to replace the items, but we took it. The last document, stating that we agree with the amount and to discharge them of any liability has been signed. Time to move on.
Lessons learned:
1) We won't buy the Set Insurance anymore - it is a sham.
2) I'll have the moving company sales rep put in writing everything they say the insurance will cover - besides the insurance contract. There's a big difference between what they promise when they want you to sign the contract and the actual contract;
3) I won't sign the contract thru Willis anymore. I'll ask the moving company for other options and I'll also demand to know what is the insurance company the brokerage firm is using and get their contact information.
I'll be better prepared for next time. And I hope you will too.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Pied a Terre
Time to start planning your home leave. It is always good to buy the plane tickets way in advance so you can fly on the days you want. But do you still have a home to go back to? Yours or family?
In our case, we didn't. We got transferred to Brazil when the house market was crashing. We had also switched companies so if we moved back we would likely move to a different state. Then, my husband decided to put the house on the market and we ended up selling it for the asking price - how could we not sell? And I'm glad we sold it when we did. But we became homeless. We only realized it a year later that we had nowhere to go. It was liberating and frightening.
I lost my parents many years ago and my husband lost his father a few years back, right before our daughter was born. His parents were divorced and we had a closer relationship with his dad. I don't have their home to go to. Staying at my husband's mother and step-father's home once was something a little awkward to all of us. The best thing to do is to stay at a hotel. We all feel more comfortable this way. Plus, we have the freedom to go to other places and tell friends and family that they can meet us there. We did it once and it was awesome! The whole family dynamics worked out much better.
Financially, you have lots of costs to consider. And if you can sell your house for the right price, then you will realize that even tough staying in a hotel for a month and a half is really expensive, it is still cheaper then the costs of keeping a home - mortgage, lawn/snow maintenance, tv, cable, phone, internet, power, water, propane... But if selling your house is not a good alternative, at least you know you'll have your home to go back to. And having a home is a very comforting feeling.
If we move again - and now it's looking more like a matter of when, not if - we'll keep our home. I'm at a point in my life that I just need a place to call home. I need a place for the kids to call home. Where they'll have friends. A place they'll look forward to come back to. That will be part of their identities.
As you can see this is just another tough decision to make. And wether or not you'll keep your pied a terre is only up to you.
In our case, we didn't. We got transferred to Brazil when the house market was crashing. We had also switched companies so if we moved back we would likely move to a different state. Then, my husband decided to put the house on the market and we ended up selling it for the asking price - how could we not sell? And I'm glad we sold it when we did. But we became homeless. We only realized it a year later that we had nowhere to go. It was liberating and frightening.
I lost my parents many years ago and my husband lost his father a few years back, right before our daughter was born. His parents were divorced and we had a closer relationship with his dad. I don't have their home to go to. Staying at my husband's mother and step-father's home once was something a little awkward to all of us. The best thing to do is to stay at a hotel. We all feel more comfortable this way. Plus, we have the freedom to go to other places and tell friends and family that they can meet us there. We did it once and it was awesome! The whole family dynamics worked out much better.
Financially, you have lots of costs to consider. And if you can sell your house for the right price, then you will realize that even tough staying in a hotel for a month and a half is really expensive, it is still cheaper then the costs of keeping a home - mortgage, lawn/snow maintenance, tv, cable, phone, internet, power, water, propane... But if selling your house is not a good alternative, at least you know you'll have your home to go back to. And having a home is a very comforting feeling.
If we move again - and now it's looking more like a matter of when, not if - we'll keep our home. I'm at a point in my life that I just need a place to call home. I need a place for the kids to call home. Where they'll have friends. A place they'll look forward to come back to. That will be part of their identities.
As you can see this is just another tough decision to make. And wether or not you'll keep your pied a terre is only up to you.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Stereotypes of Expat Wifes
Wow! I was reading some expat blogs and I am kind of shocked with what I found. I usually don't read other expat blogs but a friend suggested a couple of sites for me to read, and I did. There are some awesome sites, but there are some that portray a picture that couldn't be further from the truth. Expat wives have all the "fun"???
Really?? Do we?? Let me tell you one thing. I really think that all the blogs that portray expat wives lives as a sex-fest are a whole bunch of bull---- written by people with a big imagination and a complete lack of knowledge!! It's the work of romance writers, not of expats. Yes, I assume there are very few exceptions - I only heard of this stories, never met anyone in the expat community with this kind of life - but it is far from the norm!
Seriously, what woman, in her normal state of mind, will manage to move to another country, and in the midst of trying to learn the language, get around in the new city, unpack, find new doctors, navigate the supermarket, get everything in the house working will have an affair?? "Mingle with the locals"?? Forget about it!!
Yes, the vast majority of expat wives does have a sweet social life. Brunches, lunches, luncheons, happy hours, dinners, all different kind of socials and parties. And to be honest, this help keep us sane! This is where we meet new people with the same interest as us, it's where we make friends and it's where we can communicate and be understood. In general, expat wives live a pretty ordinary life. But I do understand why some people glamorize it. But glamorizing it is one thing. Assuming we are a bunch of horny mothers ready to prey on any local is another. We're not!
The bottom line is: If you lived a nice social life at your home country, you'll do the same as an expat. If you're more reclusive, you will keep living a reclusive life and if you're a slut, you'll still be one overseas. You won't change who you are because of your location. Also, assuming we have a "secret" life is a huge mistake! Those who do will be very disappointed.
Really?? Do we?? Let me tell you one thing. I really think that all the blogs that portray expat wives lives as a sex-fest are a whole bunch of bull---- written by people with a big imagination and a complete lack of knowledge!! It's the work of romance writers, not of expats. Yes, I assume there are very few exceptions - I only heard of this stories, never met anyone in the expat community with this kind of life - but it is far from the norm!
Seriously, what woman, in her normal state of mind, will manage to move to another country, and in the midst of trying to learn the language, get around in the new city, unpack, find new doctors, navigate the supermarket, get everything in the house working will have an affair?? "Mingle with the locals"?? Forget about it!!
Yes, the vast majority of expat wives does have a sweet social life. Brunches, lunches, luncheons, happy hours, dinners, all different kind of socials and parties. And to be honest, this help keep us sane! This is where we meet new people with the same interest as us, it's where we make friends and it's where we can communicate and be understood. In general, expat wives live a pretty ordinary life. But I do understand why some people glamorize it. But glamorizing it is one thing. Assuming we are a bunch of horny mothers ready to prey on any local is another. We're not!
The bottom line is: If you lived a nice social life at your home country, you'll do the same as an expat. If you're more reclusive, you will keep living a reclusive life and if you're a slut, you'll still be one overseas. You won't change who you are because of your location. Also, assuming we have a "secret" life is a huge mistake! Those who do will be very disappointed.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
The Gossip
Not too long ago I was asked, by an expat who's on her first assignment, what to do when a person at school won't stop asking about her husband's career. Well, it's inevitable, where there's a lot of women, there's gossip. And it's no different if you're an expat. What to do on this situations? How to avoid these questions? And why some women ask these question?
I tried to avoid being caught in the gossip on the expat community and I have to admit that it was very hard. For the longest time I avoided being caught in the gossip web, until a couple came along, moved to our development, and created lots of problems for a while. Then, people realized who the problem was and started to avoid the couple. The group stayed together and they had to stay by themselves at the pool and restaurant of the development. The lessons I've learned are here:
1) Avoid people who asks questions all the time. You will recognize the type. You will feel like you're being interrogated by the police every time you see this person. And she won't talk much about herself.
Don't be afraid to answer with evasive answers. You don't need to tell them anything. Tell them only what you feel like. And even better, ask them, with a smile on your face, why do they want to know it. This question will likely put an and to it.
2) It is very common for people to ask who your husband works for and what his job is and how long is his expat assignment for. But it's not ok to ask what his salary is, what his benefits are, if he has a corner office, etc. After you become friends you can talk about it, but not as soon as you meet someone.
There are lots of different levels of expats. GM and Ford, for instance, have expats ranging from entry level engineers all the way up to directors. Some companies only have higher level expats and some will hire foreigners as local employees with or without a hefty salary and/or bonus.
3) Beware of the women who are just trying to impress people with money. My experience is that they are just trying to keep up with the Jones'. They upgraded their lives during the assignment and have the need to show it - moved to a bigger house, bought a newer and bigger company car, hired a driver...
We were always low profile. And I always preferred that people did not know much about by life and about my husband's job. It's nobody's business. We know who we are, our friends do to and we're comfortable in our skins.
4) Do listen to your inner voice when you meet someone. You will get a feeling if the person is nice or not. Be sure that you'll meet some great people. And don't discard the locals.
See, I told you it wouldn't be easy. But it's doable! Definitely, doable!
I tried to avoid being caught in the gossip on the expat community and I have to admit that it was very hard. For the longest time I avoided being caught in the gossip web, until a couple came along, moved to our development, and created lots of problems for a while. Then, people realized who the problem was and started to avoid the couple. The group stayed together and they had to stay by themselves at the pool and restaurant of the development. The lessons I've learned are here:
1) Avoid people who asks questions all the time. You will recognize the type. You will feel like you're being interrogated by the police every time you see this person. And she won't talk much about herself.
Don't be afraid to answer with evasive answers. You don't need to tell them anything. Tell them only what you feel like. And even better, ask them, with a smile on your face, why do they want to know it. This question will likely put an and to it.
2) It is very common for people to ask who your husband works for and what his job is and how long is his expat assignment for. But it's not ok to ask what his salary is, what his benefits are, if he has a corner office, etc. After you become friends you can talk about it, but not as soon as you meet someone.
There are lots of different levels of expats. GM and Ford, for instance, have expats ranging from entry level engineers all the way up to directors. Some companies only have higher level expats and some will hire foreigners as local employees with or without a hefty salary and/or bonus.
3) Beware of the women who are just trying to impress people with money. My experience is that they are just trying to keep up with the Jones'. They upgraded their lives during the assignment and have the need to show it - moved to a bigger house, bought a newer and bigger company car, hired a driver...
We were always low profile. And I always preferred that people did not know much about by life and about my husband's job. It's nobody's business. We know who we are, our friends do to and we're comfortable in our skins.
4) Do listen to your inner voice when you meet someone. You will get a feeling if the person is nice or not. Be sure that you'll meet some great people. And don't discard the locals.
See, I told you it wouldn't be easy. But it's doable! Definitely, doable!
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Who's Ready for an Expat Assignment?
I was talking to a couple of HR directors the other day and their biggest concern was: How do we know when someone is ready to take an expat assignment?
First they need to understand that there are different levels of expats, with different costs, marital status, expectations and will. It is very different to assign a single person to an expat spot then it is to a family.
When you're young and single an expat assignment is not only an opportunity to advance your career but also to live an adventure and save some money. You'll learn a different language and culture. This looks good in any resume. It also shows that you're adaptable. And on the personal side it can be lots of fun. Meet new people, new places... All while you have many expenses paid for by the company - like housing, car and a home leave. Not bad if you're starting your career.
So I told the HR Directors that they need to look for people who are fun, easy to get along, adaptable, adventurous and most of all, who show the will to take a challenging job. Many times the candidates will share his will to move abroad with their superiors. I told them they just need to trust that this person will be the right one for the job that's being assigned for him/her.
But if we're talking about an expat candidate with a family there's a lot more to be considered. I think that most of the times the families are overlooked by HR's. For all the reasons I posted on my previous posts I think it takes a lot more than finding the right person to get a particular job done. Knowing if the family will be supportive and give this employee peace of mind to perform the job is a very important task. I am a firm believer that HR underestimates the power of a family behind the performance of their employees. The cost of living is also different for families. Most of the times it is a lot more expensive for the families to live abroad then it is in their countries. This can cause some marital problems. And instead of one person having fun there is a whole family trying to adapt to a new country. The term of the assignment is also a big factor. For some families 2 years is ideal and for some other 3 years is better. I made a few suggestions to the HR Directors but the truth is that you will only know if you made the right decision in sending an employee abroad after the fact. But you can definitely increase the odds of making it work.
First they need to understand that there are different levels of expats, with different costs, marital status, expectations and will. It is very different to assign a single person to an expat spot then it is to a family.
When you're young and single an expat assignment is not only an opportunity to advance your career but also to live an adventure and save some money. You'll learn a different language and culture. This looks good in any resume. It also shows that you're adaptable. And on the personal side it can be lots of fun. Meet new people, new places... All while you have many expenses paid for by the company - like housing, car and a home leave. Not bad if you're starting your career.
So I told the HR Directors that they need to look for people who are fun, easy to get along, adaptable, adventurous and most of all, who show the will to take a challenging job. Many times the candidates will share his will to move abroad with their superiors. I told them they just need to trust that this person will be the right one for the job that's being assigned for him/her.
But if we're talking about an expat candidate with a family there's a lot more to be considered. I think that most of the times the families are overlooked by HR's. For all the reasons I posted on my previous posts I think it takes a lot more than finding the right person to get a particular job done. Knowing if the family will be supportive and give this employee peace of mind to perform the job is a very important task. I am a firm believer that HR underestimates the power of a family behind the performance of their employees. The cost of living is also different for families. Most of the times it is a lot more expensive for the families to live abroad then it is in their countries. This can cause some marital problems. And instead of one person having fun there is a whole family trying to adapt to a new country. The term of the assignment is also a big factor. For some families 2 years is ideal and for some other 3 years is better. I made a few suggestions to the HR Directors but the truth is that you will only know if you made the right decision in sending an employee abroad after the fact. But you can definitely increase the odds of making it work.
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