Human Resources

After all we've been thru several times I know that relocating is not an easy process for any of the parts involved. Specially for HR. This is the only time when not only they have to take care of an employee but they have to take care of the employee's whole family too. But why are many HR managers and directors so reluctant to ask for help? I feel like the HR people will talk to everybody under the sun except for the people who matters the most: The family they're relocating!


HR will hire a relocation company and delegate part of the job to them, but many times the relocation companies are only interested in doing the bare minimum to help this families. I feel that it is HR's responsibility to make sure that the transition goes smooth. It is their employee we're talking about. And a happy employee is a more productive employee. And how can anyone be happy when their family is not?


I think that if you work for HR and if you have to take care of relocations you should go thru at least one yourself to be able to understand the whole process. And I mean understand, instead of downplaying it. The whole process is a lot more complex then it seems. And if anything goes wrong the blame always ends up going to HR. Even when it is the relocation company's fault. Because they are the ones who hired that relocation company. And they are the ones who have to manage them.


Being the HR person in charge of a relocation must not be easy. It must be like being put in the eye of a hurricane. You have to deal with people's emotions and expectations. And this is not an easy task.


I would love to have an honest talk with HR people just to put things in perspective. Listen to them. Teach them all the steps of this move and what to prioritize and what not. Give them a different perspective. Tell them what matters and what doesn't. Teach them how to make everybody's life easier. Including theirs. 

Life after Expat

As I mentioned on my previous post, one thing that people often don't see is that you won't have a job to go back to when you decide to relocate. Once you accept the relocation offer, your current job will offered to someone else. As soon as the other person accepts it, your job is gone! So what if things in the new country don't work out? And what happens when your term is done?

Going back will be a hard thing to do in both cases. And to me, the first case is not an option. And the second case is very complex. There are a few things we should consider:

1)   Do you have a career plan?

2)   How many other people are keeping an eye on the job you want?

3)   Is there a real chance for you to get this job in 2 or 3 years?

4)   Would you consider another position abroad?

5)   Would you consider switching company?

The answer to all this questions is not easy and it is very personal. You are taking a chance to get more experience, make yourself more valuable to the company and get a promotion when your job is done. So everybody, family included, hope that the sacrifice will be worth it.

There is the obvious funnel effect when we start thinking about a promotion. The higher you are within your company the less spots will be open for promotions. So you will have to prove to the company that you indeed did a good job and that your experience on the current job is preparing you to take on new challenges and responsibilities. Seems like I am stating the obvious, right? But you will be surprised with how many people don’t see things this way.

And now that you prove to your company that you can get the job done under difficult circumstances – different language, culture and environment – they may decide that you are the right guy to take on a new challenge elsewhere.

Once you have international experience you became more marketable to headhunters. Other companies may need you and your expertise. But you will have to prove yourself all over again.

And there is always the possibility of getting an extension and staying where you are.

So a year before your term is done is time to start thinking about where you want to be once the relocation is over. The choice is up to you.

House Hunters International

Does it matter what country we move to?


I am watching House Hunters International now and this episode is about a family relocating to Shanghai. I couldn't help but notice that it doesn't matter what country we move to it will always feel like we're moving to another planet. It is not only the language barrier or the distance from home. It is the cultural chock. No matter how open you are and how much of the other culture you want to experience this is the common ground.  


I have friends who moves to other english speaking countries - England and Australia - and they still went thru the cultural shock. We need to adapt to a lot more then people give us credit for. And we also need to change our expectations on lots of things.


Like the couple on the tv show we also had to sell our dream home. We had moved in a year before we got the job offer and we all loved it. Perfect size, perfect lot, perfect neighborhood. And what were we getting into? We had no idea.


So it's funny to see how the look and see trip can be so bitter sweet. We're taking a job opportunity too good to pass, visiting a new school, looking for a new house and also getting ready to leave behind our lives. Home, school, family, friends... And the current job too. 


While house hunting the couples usually have different expectations and desires. Women tend to like certain things - like amenities, well equipped kitchens and nice bathrooms. Men, on the other hand like to stay close to work and to have room for a huge tv. And girls, we have to give it to the guys. A shorter commute is a good thing for all of us. 


But finding the perfect house for our families is just the first step. Adapting to the country - language, food and habits - can be a lot more challenging. Now this would be a good tv show.

Super Commute x Relocating

Well, as you know, the school options in mexico are not the best. The fact that they hadn't been open about the reason why the are "accredited under advisement" is not a good sign, in my opinion. And the fact that they try to hide this fact on their websites, leading people to believe that they are fully accredited schools only make it worse to me. So what are my other options?


At this point we are living between Florida and Mexico City. We go there every other weekend and my husband does the same, alternating. This way the kids are getting a flavor of Mexico and I will have more time to evaluate the other alternatives. We would like to move to Mexico City by the end of this school year. 


The other school we're looking into are the british schools, Greengates and Eton. Two completely different alternatives, I know, but they may be the only solution. It seems like they both offer good education but I don't know how their curriculums will compare to the american curriculum.


We know of another couple - the husband is american and works with my husband - who is just pulling their kids out of AFC and going to Greengates. I will go for my interview there in 2 weeks. I can't wait to see what's all about. It will be nice to have the whole family together again if it work out. And I hope it does.


But I must say, we're pretty happy doing the super commute. Being back to the U.S. after 3 1/2 years abroad is like a breath of fresh air. All the traveling is still ok with us, the kids love to fly and they're enjoying Mexico City . To them it's like a weekend vacation. We have some nice people caring for our pets on the weekends we're gone. But I know this will get old soon. So the options will be having my husband do the super commute every weekend or moving to Mexico. It is only a 2 1/2 hour flight. And he's so used to traveling that he thinks this could actually work. Plus now is a good time to buy a house in Florida. And if he gets transferred elsewhere we can keep a home-base here.


In the end it will come down to where can the kids get a better education. I know Florida is not a top rank state but there are some really good schools here. Both public and private. Our options are endless. And, in my opinion, contrary to others, Mexico City does not offer top notch education. 


My kids are now enrolled at a great public school but they may go to a private middle school when time comes. And they couldn't be happier with their school here. We truly believe that the best gift we can give to our children is education. And we didn't buy the story that what we sacrifice in their schooling they will get in international experience. We want both. So this is where we're at right now. 

From The Expat Wife’s Husband

Hi. This is the husband. I thought it would be interesting giving my side of the story, specifically the ups and downs of an international job.

Why go international?

I went international mostly for the adventure. As a college grad I didn’t exactly pursue the most exhilarating life for myself. But, I always had a taste for a little adventure and a little travel. It was a pleasant surprise to find out that international travel and an international post are possible while still taking advantage of the investment I had put in with my education. You can go international without throwing away everything you worked for (like joining the Peace Corp or something).

I went international when I was single and life was simple. I didn’t have too many pre-conceptions and was basically taking whatever the assignment would offer. A nice consequence has been the pay and career advancement. If you can go international and make it work from both sides (local and home office) then you have created some value for yourself with your company and in the market.

Another advantage is my mind is that when you go international you are special. It will be likely that you will be the only, or at least one of the very few, foreigners in your office. The rules will be different for you and you can be more of an individual than staying in your home country. “What … I’m not wearing any shoes today? Well that’s just how we do it where I come from.” Done and done. You can be who you want to be.

The secretaries. Internationally you will get a secretary who’s main goal is to make your life easier. They protect you from jerks, separate you from people you don’t want to see, and will generally do whatever it takes to help you accomplish your goals. Secretaries in the US, if you’re lucky enough to get one, care only about themselves. Believe me, I’ve had 3 international secretaries now that are 1,000 times better than anything you’ll find in the states.

The women. Well, you know …

Downisdes

Obviously, going international means being separated from your family and friends, which is a downside but the how much of a downside varies widely. For me, it didn’t really change things that much. I still got to see my relatives over the holidays and could communicate as much as I wanted via phone, e-mail whatever. Not that much different than being in the US for me!

But, for some it could represent a major change and maybe the international life isn’t the best choice for them.

There is also the cultural side. Going international can be somewhat of a change if you go to another country that speaks the same language but has different food, sports, entertainment, senses of humor etc… Or, going international can be roughly equivalent to going to a different planet if you go somewhere with a completely different language, alphabet, racial mix, government system etc…

I chose something in-between and was actually very surprised how much of my home country’s culture I was able to retain. Again, I didn’t join the Peace Corp or become a foreign exchange student – I went international to have an adventure but not completely redefine myself. Luckily, the technology today allows for a lot of local culture to be accessed in foreign countries. The #1 for me being podcasts: I can follow what I want o follow from home and handle traffic at the same time. They have been great. In addition, I can get a lot of local sports live via TV thru the internet. It’s another big plus to occasionally be able to catch a game in your native language, and I even enjoy the local commercials. It’s a breath of fresh air after living in a different world for most of the time. I imagine you could also take great advantage of facebook, twitter, texting and the like as well. I haven’t done much of this personally because I get enough of the computer at work – the last thing I’m looking for outside of work is more computer time – with the exception of this blog  of course …

But, as an expat you will miss the coffee machine conversation about the game, latest celeb scandal or whatever. That’s a definite downside and one of the costs of going international. If you go international, you need to be able to weather some loneliness. While I am no exception, I came to realize as well that life moves on whether you go international or not, and your past is your past. You will meet new people and gradually move on with your own life either way.

  

So, I think you can tell that I am happy with my decision. I view going international and just another one of several possible paths I could have taken. I met a great wife, had great kids and do pretty well financially. Can’t complain at all.

Cooking Overseas

This has been a challenge. Adapt to new ingredients. I am a bad cook. I've been spoiled by years of having a housekeeper. I know how to cook a few dishes and I cook them well, but that's it. My friends joke that if a dish has more than 4 ingredients I won't be able to prepare. So what if the 4 ingredients are not what I'm used to?


As I said before the food in the supermarket is different. In Brazil lots of  food had heavy cream and it was sold in cans or in bottles. In mexico there are lots of different vegetables. But how do I prepare them? I want to learn how to be a better cook. I want to be able to cook with local ingredients. And cook by myself. I don't want the housekeeper to prepare every meal. And I also don't want to go to restaurants all the time.


We've been living between the U.S. and Mexico City. We're doing the super commute. This makes my life easy because I can bring food on my suitcase. I bring canned pumpkin to Mexico and I bring hot pepper back to the U.S.


And I was thinking about this topic because I just saw that I almost have one thousand hits on the blog. It may not seem as much to some, but to me it is something that I've never dreamed of. I was so surprise when I got my first reader! And my first comment! I love the comments, by the way. It was so nice to see that people who could relate to me. I am not alone struggling to do the best for my family while traveling around the Americas. I started the blog as a way to vent and to maybe help other people facing the same issues I was. I really hope reading it was helpful to you.


And to me the best way to celebrate is with food. So for the person who sends me the best and easiest recipe from your country - it doesn't need to have only four ingredients but it may contain ingredients that are easy to find around the world and be easy to prepare - I'll send my favorite treat. Maple syrup and pancake mix from Williams Sonoma. So let's get cooking.

Medical Care

First I must say that the last place we lived in the U.S. before we moved to Brazil was Wilmington, DE. So for comparison purposes I will be referring to Christiana Hospital and doctors in that area. 


And if you had to guess where the best medical care between Wilmington, Sao Paulo and Mexico City is, what would you guess?


In my opinion Sao Paulo is by far the best. And Mexico City would be number 3. Albert Einstein, Sirio and Libanes Hospitals  and Hospital do Coracao are just the best. As good as Johns Hopkins and Mount Sinai Medical Center, if not better. The facilities are new or renovated and the doctors are knowledgeable, nice and most of them speak perfect english. Many of the doctors there got some kind of training in the U.S. Any time you schedule an appointment be prepared to send at least 30 minutes with the doctor. They like to listen to you to give you the best diagnose. They will also ask for all kinds of exams they think you'll need without having to worry about the insurance companies. The insurance companies have to pay for the exams there. I do think that there's no better place to get sick. We had excellent doctors there.


Christiana Hospital was very good. It had new wings and renovated ones. It had good doctors. But the doctors seemed to always be in a rush.  I always felt like I had to present them the diagnostic and they would medicate us. The consultations only took 15 minutes tops and the minimal amount of exams were asked.


I haven't needed a hospital in Mexico City yet, but I did visit ABC Hospital twice and I was not impressed. The facilities were old and it did not seem like the equipments were brand new. Some of my mexican friends who are living in Brazil now told me that the medical in Brazil is much better.


But truth is, I hope we don't need to go to a hospital anywhere.