Welcome to the expat life!

I'm going on my second international relocation as a wife. We moved to Sao Paulo, Brazil, about 3 years ago and now we're moving to Mexico City, Mexico.
As I know very well relocating is not easy but it is a choice. So, even with all the issues we have I'll try to make the best out of it!

Pages

Monday, June 27, 2011

How and Where to Make Friends

I was talking to a recently divorced friend and this subject came up. It is easy for us, moms, to make friends. We have play dates, school,  kids activities... It all leads us to other moms in the same situation then us, so we have a bond. But what if you're following your spouse? What if you don't have a job and you don't have kids?


It is a lot more difficult! You'll be lonely most of the time in the beginning. You won't have an instant bond with a group of peers that can speak your language. You can meet some people at the gym or in your neighborhood, but in my experience it is a lot harder to go thru a relocation as a couple then it is as a family.


Most of the time the locals already have their families and friends. In latin countries there will be the "nice to meet you, I'll call you", but they never call. It is not that they don't intend to or they don't like you, it is just that they're busy. It's not personal.  Go ahead and call them yourself. Make an effort to make new friends. Invite people over for diner or to go out for lunch.


You can get involved in volunteer work, newcomers clubs, join a gym, take some classes. But do something. Try to interact. Avoid being lonely. Don't get depressed. Tag along with the moms. And moms, make sure to include your new friends without kids on your activities. Invite them over for lunch. Or to go to a happy hour if you have a babysitter.


And go out with your spouse. Take nice trips, go to bars and nightclubs. Enjoy yourself. Find out where the cool places are and go there. You will end up meeting some interesting people. Go to the best hairstylist in town, they'll let you know where the best spots are. It will be money well spent. Enjoy life without kids. You won't regret it!

No comments: